Impatiently patient

Christmas is such a lovely time of year.

It's cold outside. You get to layer, and dress as funky or as professional as you want. Mix them both together, it's actually kind of cute.

Just the "feeling" you get in December. There's so much more giving, and less taking. I'm really looking forward to it. And though, I have not much to give. I have me to give.

Dillon should be arriving home this month. Maybe next. It's still a battle of communication, but at the same time, when I do get a hold of them, I couldn't be more thankful for the people God placed as my caseworkers. Yeah, things aren't done "on time" or the way "I'd like them to be handled", but there are a lot of things in life that didn't go according to the way "I" would like things to have gone. I trust in His plan.
I think this year, because it will literally be just me and Dillon for Christmas, there's no need to do it all alone. There's too many people out there who have even less then we do. So in return, we're going to find some organization for feasting the poor. Whatever it takes. We're going to give.

I've already been getting stuff down from the attic. Christmas stuff. I just want to skip Halloween altogether. But, I'll still find myself volunteering for the church, and watching kids from near and far smile with enjoyment as they slip their little feet out of their slip on shoes to climb up the blown-up slide, and feed their energy with yet another piece of candy. =)

I've been finding that I have this urge to start putting up Christmas lights on the house. But I don't want the neighbors to think I'm insane. So I'm impatiently being patient.

I'm still working on the words to express, so forgive me... as I'm still finding myself. It's like my feelings, patterns, trust, and words have been ripped out of my soul. I don't know how long it will take, but I'm sure it will be easier the day Dillon arrives and I tuck him in as he falls asleep in his bed for the first time.

With sooooooo much love pending,
Julie