Today

Today was a hard day at church. I ache.

I asked God to forgive those things I said to Jimmy, so I will know in my heart, I finally have done the right thing.

I can't speak for Jimmy. I don't know what's going on in his life. He has his own relationship with God.

As for an answer?
I don't know the answers to anything yet.

I pray that his family will be healed by this whole thing, because I know they hurt too.

I'm sorry Chris.
I'm sorry Karen.
I'm sorry Alison.
I'm sorry Johnathan.



I take responsibility for my actions, my words, my behavior.
I'm human, and the only thing I can do is ask you for forgiveness.

Although Jimmy wont forgive me now, I pray that one day in his heart, he'll somehow find a way to get ahold of me and let me know that he does forgive me.

I miss him. I truly do. Even through all the heartache.
Even through everything that has been said or done to.
I forgive you.



I fell on my knees at church today. I couldn't get up. Worship had me focus on my priorities. I can only apologize so much.


The first year of marriage is supposed to be hard. We've both said things that got under eachothers skin.
I'm willing to do whatever it takes. God HATES divorce.
I love him. I'm willing to fight for our marriage.
If we can get through this, we can get through anything.
But it takes him to want to fight with me.

I want to love, cherish, be a good wife. I desire to be a good wife for him. As much as he may doubt it now. I enhale Proverbs 31 as if I can never let it go.

My love remains.