Billy Bobs Texas

Soooo, out of alllll the years of my life I've lived here, youdve thunk I've gone to Billy Bobs. lol. Nuh uh.

Well all the girlfriends got together to see Lonestar.

We had a grand ol time. Def have to do it again. But this time... I'm bringing Dillon since KIDS CAN GET IN!!!

I'll have a dance parter :) a reall genuine if a heart, dancer.

<3

Wonderful night.


Oh oh oh! One more thing. So I get that I look really young on a daily base anyways but this was kinda cool. And EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD (Major LOL) asked me how old I was. I asked him to guess, he said 19!!! lol!!!!!!!! That's when I asked him how old he was then told him my real age and went back to my business. Haha!!! That was the best though. A younger guy telling me I was 19. Ha! That's pretty neat.

The next one asked if I was 21 yet. That he thought I was 21. Geez, I'm not sure what to say. I suppose those youngns look way older than they are. Sumthin'.

So I get this phone call from a girl saying that she is SO EXCITED that she found my card that she's been searching for for 3 years now! lol

She used to watch my son in the kids club at LAFitness back when I was married. She was telling me how much she missed seeing me and Dillon. How she used to help him with his homework and how ripped he was!

She told me she saw my ex husband at the LA in Arlington around a year ago asking about us. Supposedly he said we had a rough ending. Hm, wonder why.

Anyways, I sent her a pic of Dillon that I took yesterday. He's still just as ripped. Now, I'm trying to get back to where I used to be. It's not been easy after breaking my neck but I haven't given up, never will. I think I'm just too hard on myself.

Dillon has a triathlon next weekend. Very much looking forward to it! I did my first Tri right before my accident, I'm now training for another, which I plan on doing one at the end of June. We shall see!

My very best friend in Cali talked on the phone earlier about single life. We both laughed cause we want kids and how we both feel like there just aren't any good guys out there. Truly feel that way. They're all so very deceitful. Anyways, we brought up donors. I looked up how to get a donor online and the process is quite simple. Oh, to be a mommy of a little one again would make my heart melt to pieces. I LOVE and adore my son so much and he is growing up to be a fine young man. Always wanting a brother or sister that I never had the chance to give him. And it's not just about that. It's my age and the set of mind I am in today. I have been through a lot, and I have seen a lot. And I gotta say,.. I'm a pretty great momma and have a pretty good balance... all but fixing my fence which I'm still trying to dig that cement block out of the ground!!! Argh.

Please check back though... got some fun and exciting things coming up beginning June 4th!

Much love!!!! ...unconditional

Gosh, I make BEAUTIFUL babies!!!

Here's my wonderful son beginning his 800 meters.

You know what really sucks?

It's having the intentions of being friends with someone you think can be a super duper leader for the kingdom.

When something so little, so minute creeps in and changes all of your thoughts.

If someone can lie without hesitation saying that they were "too busy" to respond to your text yet on their fb, they've updated, commented several times, not including having to of listened to an entire lengths song,.. just really shocks me.

I'm very glad that my standards are so high and that my sensor within me is so strong.

Because I firmly believe that if you can lie about a silly dumb thing,... you can most definitely lie about big serious things.

I love to watch people. Pay attention to people. Good and bad. I truly focus on every single individual. Because I care. I care about how I live my life and do my very best to not make mistakes others make by watching them, and I take the good that people have done and apply it to my life as well.

I absolutely wouldn't change who I am. I love being me. I give so much of me and I am honest and obedient. I would never take back my trials because I have learned from them and have been able to share but letting people know that they are not alone.

So in this, I will pray for myself which I seldom do. I pray that God steadily protects me with his constant armour. That whatever the path he lay for me I will take with honor. That my heart will stay vigilant yet fragile. And that I will consistently wilt in Your arms and serve You. Forever.

You want it but you're scared.

You try, but then the smallest thing tenses every muscle within you wondering if he is going to be the same as everyone else.

I run turn away when I see the slightest thing that scares me, when all I want is for someone to grab me and say "You're afraid, I am too, but I promise as God has promised me that I will not leave!"

And you know, then kiss passionately and "the end" like a fairy tale.

Things are much more complicated then I ever remember them being.

I have taken things from different individuals of what I love and have invisioned my perfect other whole. Not half, because I no longer see him as half. I see him as complete the way he is. Beyond joyful, satisfied as to where God has his position in the world.

I rarely EVER go on dates. But I did meet up with someone last weekend. Oh my gosh, like everything was like wayyyyyyyy too in common. Which was absolutely cool! Amazing individual, and is seriously going to be like the most amazing husband ever. I think maybe it was the nerves, maybe not,. but I was too scared to take the chance. I noticed I asked him a lot more questions than he'd ask me. Same with face to face. It kinda bothered me that he didn't put his computer away our first meet.

That made me remember a moment when I was married. My ex asked me to put electronics away often. I guess I needed to get a taste of it to see how it really felt. It didn't feel so good to not feel important enough. So it was a great thing for me to experience it. To simply understand.

I didn't feel like I was "enough" so I immediately turned away.

It's so difficult in this world, and actually, I am quite pleased just how I am now. That doesn't mean that I don't think about being madly deeply incredibly branded with passionate love! I think about it often. Perhaps too often, but as well have a good balance for loving myself, my son, our future and don't want anything to set us back.

Maybe it's also a trust factor that still resides within myself.

But wouldn't it sure be nice to have the person who without a doubt that is truly a man of God holding your face in his hands saying, "Let's do this! Forever".

Haha. Well, I will get out of my fantasy world now. Going to go spend my birthday money that I still haven't used yet. I promised everyone that this yer I would use it on me and not everyone else. So, here goes!

Ciao and much XOXO's

Spring 2012 Semester has come to close...

Dun dun dunnnnnnn....

I gotta say, I truly worked my tail end off this semester. I may be a little exhausted from this week. A little tired, and maybe a bit of a feeling like my head is about to explode in teeny tiny pieces... BUT... on the contrary......

...drum roll please..........


This girl (right here. yes, the one typing to you now) who is the first person in her family to go to college,... who happened to lack every bit of curricular intelligence... just whooped out a GPA of 3.7 for this semester baby!!! Wha! Wha!!!

I murdered my books!!!!!!!!!!! ...with highlighter marks that is.

Okay, I am excited to say... BOOYAH! lol

I'd like to give a big shout out to...

Professor Stott, who completely ignored me in his Math class, even with sitting in the front row! He left it up to us individuals to succeed. And that I did. Super excited. And might I add... surprised. lol

Professor Guyer, thanks a whole heck of a lot for filling my head with additional nutritional information that will now only get on my friends nerves. So I will be referring them to you from now on. It's your fault.

Professor Bisbee, my oh my... I am so thankful I took your class. After having my entire art portfolio stollen, I hadn't picked up a sketch pad in years. Because of you, I now have a good start in just a few short months. Thank you.

Professor Huddleston & Beecham, one... you're too smart. two... you teach too fast... three... you expect us to memorize it the minute it comes out of your mouth. LOL! But I LOVE the challenge!!!

Professor Balakrishnan, you have such a wonderful calming spirit about you. How amazing it is that you get to get paid for teaching about our surroundings of natural science in ecology! You, Huddleston & Beecham make a great Biology and Geology team!!!

Last but not least,... Professor Engel. I can almost cry thinking that there is that SLIGHT possibility that I may never get a chance to see you again, or simply tell you thank you. Going into your class, I won't lie,.. I was a little intimidated. You're loud (lol), stern and at first it comes across that your class is going to be difficult, but after just a few classes, I began to recognize your character. You are these things because you believe in every one of your students. Because you will not have any less then what you expect from us! No offense to the above instructors, but you were my favorite. Not just of this semester,... but of every semester I have ever taken. You have truly cared like a mama bear cares for her cubs and teaches them how to survive! In our case, succeed! Though you may or may not ever know of my journey up ahead, I hope that one day when we meet in heaven, I can tell you my successes in which began from the belief of my instructor Professor Engel. Some of the BEST people go through the biggest hardships. You have a story, one of which I can understand. May there be many future moments of happiness and I can only pray that your world is filled with people that "water the roots" of your life! You are strong, and I couldn't be happier to be one of your first students to gossip around campus about how this professor (you) was the BEST professor you could possibly ever have. EVER.



3.7!!!!!!!!!!!

Just a little collage on some of the things from this semester. There are SO many more but here are the few I could take quick pictures of (and a couple I already had taken). Must get back to homework!!! Ciao

Even if you DONT know something, yet you believe in yourself and you work HARD, you WILL succeed! No question! How determined and motivated are you???

This would be my Math test score. The subject not only had I struggled in,... but didn''t even attempt to TRY after everyone had learned their multiplication in grade school and I never did.

"A Broken Wife"

This is a drawing that I sketched up came from the innermost parts of me. Even after being healed for so long, it is good to remember some of lifes trials,... it helps those who are experiences them at this very moment. This sketch is the meaning of my surrendered soul to a man, who was supposed to be my once forever love, walking away... with someone other than me.

This depicts the emotions after my divorce.

Sometimes it takes us awhile to forgive, but what remains... is that we will never forget.